Hi, I stumbled upon your group page when I was googling about picky eaters.

My boyfriend is one, and today his workmate deliberately put tomatoes and onions into the staff meal when my bf had said he didn't like them. My bf got upset, he said he was tired of people trying to feed him things he didn't like, and that he doesn't get what's so wrong about it that others have to 'right' it. I was once guilty of that (somewhat given up now), but like Joyce's husband, I'd give in to the pickiness but do not comprehend it. But his complaint today just tugged at my heart. I had to find out more about this. And my initial search directed me here.

After reading your stories I think I do understand this a little better now. My bf went through similar histories, being force-fed as a child and getting a beating when he didn't eat or when he threw up. Cucumber is one of his kryptonite and he could smell it from a mile away and that would send him running the opposite direction (okay, exagerated, but once he walked away from me because I was snacking on cucumber and the smell put him off) When we went to house parties it was only to close friends who knew and would accomodate his strict diet; if it were someone not too close or new, he would hesitate, or just eat bread.

We do make fun of him and his eating habits, but I never knew it was so serious. There were times when I wonder if our relationship will ever work out in the long run, because we currently make our own meals separately despite living together. But that's not what a family meal looks like to me, or I feel sad that I cannot share food that I love with the person I love.

We've been together for 2.5 years and he is the sweetest person ever. I feel ashamed that I've been hurting him for so long, when I should be the one on his side.

Sorry for the long entry, I just thought I'd tell my side of the story.

I really want to thank you to have made this page. I will still look around for more information, but you have given me an initial insight on how to better support my loved one.